Cameron Opens His Mouth And Puts His Foot In It

Somebody is going to have to stop Cameron opening his mouth on Foreign Affairs, because every time he does, he makes the most appalling gaffes. After choosing India as the location for talking about Pakistan as  sponsors of international terrorism, and referring to Gaza as a prison camp, Cameron's World Comedy Tour has rolled into Hove and onto the subject of Iran. To loud guffaws from his Tory Comedy Club audience, David proceeded to say that it is "a fact" that Iran have "a nuclear weapon"!

A spokesman has tried to paper over the crack, saying, "It is perfectly clear that he is talking about the pursuit of a nuclear weapon,"  but that will not be perfectly clear to I'madinnerjacket in Tehran, that's for sure. David has been quick to apologise, saying "If I have upset anyone I'm profoundly sorry," but I'm not sure those words will be as widely reported in Iran, unless the headline, "British Primeminister Makes A Grovelling Apology" are employed. Dear David, he is doing wonders for our image abroad isn't he? Mind you, the Americans love him. Apart from crediting the Yanks with winning the Battle of Britain, Cameron is even managing to make Bush look credible!  America only had a Bush for President, we have a complete C*** for PM!

Of course, we all know what happened the last time a British Primeminister was convinced that an Arab nation had weapons of mass destruction, don't we? But Cameron is unlikely to launch a war just yet, he has to get rid of 40% of our military personnel and hardware first! Still, I'm sure he will hit on the idea of reintroducing a cavalry soon, on the basis that horses are much cheaper than tanks, and then feel confident to green light an invasion of Iran under the slogan, "It worked for Lawrence so it can work again!"

Cameron Wants 5 Year Fixed Term On Council Housing

Well it only seems fair doesn't it? David has agreed a 5 year fixed term tenure on his council house in Downing Street, so why shouldn't the same rule apply to every other bugger in the country? Of course David has a palatial home awaiting him should the great British electorate give him the heave ho at the end of his present tenancy agreement but what the hell, everybody else can look to the private sector for accommodation when their five year lease on their council home expires, can't they?

The policy was no doubt suggested by back room staffer Peter Rachman. Why provide a council house for life? Give people a foot up to start, but then after 5 years, offer them the enforced opportunity to make their own way without support from the state. What could be more reasonable than that?

Of course, Simon Hughes is expressing concerns, but he moans about everything doesn't he? The way he goes on, anybody would think the guy came into politics because he has a conscience. Cleggy needs to have a word in his shell like and point out that principles count for nothing, it is power that counts.

If Hughes is really that unhappy with what is going on, he could always resign from the Lib Dems and start up his own party. He might even call it the Liberal Party and seek to occupy a position to the left of centre, instead of to the left of the far right. When the Lib Dems disappear after the next election, Simon might just find lots of people in woolly cardigans happy to join his party!